Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
