I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
