Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
