OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
