This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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