I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Randomize
