when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Randomize
