But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
