Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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