Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
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