he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Randomize
