Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
