I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Randomize
