I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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