Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Randomize
