Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
the liver wants what the liver wants
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
