I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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