So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
