I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
