So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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