but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
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