It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Did I show you my penis last night?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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