it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
