did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
