Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
We need to feng shui this bitch.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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