Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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