so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
