We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
