He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
I need water and some morals
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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