bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
So squirting runs in the family.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize