Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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