I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Randomize
