the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
