; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
