i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
Randomize
