at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
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