Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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