I must be too annoying 4 u.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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