i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
