they need to just BURY HIM!
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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