then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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