I think I am morally bankrupt
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Randomize
