bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize