You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
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