He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize
