office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
