I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
