I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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