Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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