I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
she smelled like a LAN party
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
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